I have known people, who have been quite sure of what they wanted to do in life and even arrived where they knew they wanted to be. I have admired their clarity. I, on the other hand have been a drifter, never sure what I wanted to do or be in life and as I drifted from one course to another considered one job or another, I was not arriving anywhere, rather I was forever eliminating what I didn't want!
Definitely not medicine or engineering, too much study involved, try agriculture maybe. Nope, agriculture as a subject was proving too memory based for me; bailed out from the field after graduating into Environment Science, hoping I might find something interesting to do in that sphere.
Non Governmental Organisations seemed interesting but they worked where I couldn’t communicate my cosmopolitan mindset. Education field could provide an opportunity to communicate? Yeah this seems right for me and yet there were lot of other works, and interferences involved which edged out the freedom and hence efficiency of the communication.
I am sure I do not seem very practical? After all, any job will have one or the other uninteresting aspect to it! Why wouldn't I adjust, why was I only always eliminating what I did not want to do? Yeah it is true I did not need a job for a living, I needed it rather to express my being...
And finally by a twist of circumstances and unrelated happenings, through those very, seemingly wrong choices and the people and institutions I came across as a result of those choices, I arrived at the job I found just right for me. Preparing a course material for college in my subject Environmental Science. In this work, there was to be clearly thought out written communication, there was freedom to express more or less the way I wanted to, and that too in a subject I had passion for. Just an over one year work, but it brought me the satisfaction I had been looking for all my life. I realized then, that we all have an internal compass and one way of arriving at what we want is through a process of eliminating what we don’t want!
And even as I journeyed through the process of preparing the material, there were intriguing coincidences. Whichever topic I was working on,seemed to be the topic the world was working on during the same time frame.
When I was writing about nuclear hazards, the Fukushima nuclear disaster in Japan happened and I added an additional reading and perspective on it.
When I was writing on capitalism affecting food distribution, highly priced tomatoes were being abandoned by farmers on the roads of Jharkhand because middlemen wouldn’t pay them even the production cost, leave alone transportation cost.
Whatever topic my mind was filled with were the topics my eyes fell upon wherever I looked, newspapers, books, magazines, even facebook! It was as if the topics were travelling to me. In that period it was as if the universe had been helping me, not only in collecting and perfecting the content, but even strangely in meeting deadlines; as if I had been destined to do this Job in this time frame.
What I could conclude is exactly what Paulo Cohelo says in Alchemist, “There are no coincidences”. When we, our very core, wants something, however unsure we are about what it is, all things work together to bring it to us, be it through a process of elimination. And so however winding, long or tormentous our road may seem, we are never drifting; rather we are always going where we are meant to go.