The Fallen Manhood

It is said that a society is known by the way it treats its women. It is said that women used to be respected in some era and some societies….

I did not want to write a post on a pointless pursuit. I don’t have to write what is the way the women are being treated today,… and that speaks all. Why I take my virtual pen finally to write is the ‘rate’ of deterioration of the society that has come to view in the past few months. I am troubled enough to be pushed to post a question as to why the society is spreading its viciousness towards women in such a geometrically progressing pace?

There was a report that one of the reasons is that violence against women depicted in movies is reflected back into society. That’s a point I quite agree with. Many movies I watched have disturbed me. Some for the foul double meaning language that the veteran heroes of the south use with women; the disrespect and objectification spewing from their words. When heroes do it, the fans follow. It is indeed visibly reflected in the society.

Other movies disturb me for how a large section of the males in the audience react, when they watch on screen the plight of a woman shuddering in fear and misery! Shockingly (maybe not surprisingly) quite a large part of it, jeers and laughs in pleasure! Lustful society indeed that cannot see a woman beyond her body.

Men would blame it on the women for having objectified themselves. Have the women of today really objectified themselves? Well, what option is left with the insecure womanhood, if she has to find or keep a man; when the only thing any Man is willing to ‘love’ her for, is her body and she is constantly in threat of being dumped for a better or younger 'model'?

What makes man so insensitive?
Curiosity does lead humankind into the dark lanes. I know of someone who tried beer. And then he tried it quite frequently. But he became aware that the beer was pulling him into the liquor lane. He also realized he had the capacity to become an addict. From that point of realization he did something that requires great strength. He made a decision and stuck by it. The decision was to never touch even beer! There are rarely any anecdotes I remember with as much admiration as this. He is one real strong Man. He had strength enough to resist even the ‘little finger’ of an irresistible evil.

I don’t know if anybody realizes the powerful truth in what the three monkeys of Gandhiji teach - “Don’t see evil, don’t hear evil, don’t speak evil” For evil is very powerful. It can suck you in, into its vicious grip. You may start by curiosity about the evil, but you never know how and when as you move more and more into the lane, in an explorers spirit, you become part of that evil, you become addicted; some evils that were repulsive to begin with, end up becoming a source of pleasure.

This happens to be the story of all sorts of addictions. Its starts with a one time and then suddenly, you realize that you are in the vicious grip of a snake, that slowly pushes out all your sense of right and wrong, deadens your spirit and makes you a ball of mass that ‘laughs and jeers at grossly wrong places’. Such a person no longer cares what a petty sight he makes, he is hardly aware of it, for he convinces himself that he is proud of his sickness. That it is his Manliness, his strength!

Weakness it is.. Can a man be so strong as to let go of even the finger of the evil when he realizes where it is leading to? Can a man be so strong as to not even touch beer no matter how his buddies laugh at him? Not even be incited by peer pressure and insinuations of not being a man? Can a man be as strong as that! If there is such a man, then he surely is a Man!

Today what we also see is that no man seems to have the strength to stand by a woman to protect her! ‘Manliness’, they convince themselves, is rather in abusing the weak women in all possible ways and blaming every failing on them. For the measure of pain and blame man is capable of giving, he does not have the strength to take even a fourth of it!

They think ,act and talk ‘lust’, and then they hide their lustful nature behind the insinuations to womanhood as sluts and objects of entertainment. Not that they believe the sex seeker image of women projected by the ‘virtual businesses’ that thrive on lies; but rather they are weak and prefer pointing their finger at the woman than admit that they have in fact objectified themselves; that their ‘whole world’ from thoughts to words to actions, revolves around their… ‘object’.
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After incidents like in Guwahati, the ‘show time’ made by the media and society out of that teenage girl's plight at the hands of jeering senseless men; women must have lost any remaining respect for manhood or any hopes from society in general to genuinely empathize with their situations. That naïve girl believed she had empathic ears as she talked to the camera! She is too young to know, that it is not just a matter of few fishes, it’s the whole river that is dirty.

As men conveniently forget to care about women whom they were designed to protect, they turn out to be woman’s worst enemies. They numb themselves, and do not care where they stand in the ‘lowly’ woman’s eyes.
By the by, what does the Man in today’s society look like in the Woman’s eyes? I am sure in any mature women’s eyes they are the weakest Men, weaker than even women, that any era could produce

But the truth is, it does not help to hate the sick. The sick have to come down from the throne of pride and see their sickness for what it is, only then can they help themselves out of it. The men who claim to be strong by harassing the weak, should come to terms with the weakness it actually is. Men have to abandon their high horses called “Manhood” that take them to hell holes. They should not lose their head to the powers of evil, rather, they should finally show their strength where it is really required; against the power of the dark as it pulls their right senses in. The head can rule again if it is kept where it belongs. That power is for Man to summon, for it is in his own hand.

Paradise----Heaven on Earth

Man is said to be made in the image of the Cosmic Purusha (Cosmic Man). There are said to be seven Lokas or worlds and man therefore is made similarly with seven chakras.

Chakras are pools of energy in our bodies which govern our qualities. There are said to be seven main chakras in all; four in our upper body ( the crown chakra(sahastra), the third eye chakra, The throat chakra, the heart chakra), which govern our mind (yang); and three in the lower body (the solar plexus chakra, the sacral chakra, the root chakra) which govern our instincts (yin).

Kundalini energy is the Goddess, Earth, Mother, Shakti, the universal yin or Earth Chi within all of us. This energy is drawn up through the feet and through the lower chakras.

It awaits the Union with God, Spirit, Father, Shiva, universal Yang or Heaven Chi which collects in the body through the Crown chakra (sahasra) located at the center of the top of the head. This point through which Heaven chi enters the body, is the place of transcendent consciousness or true Self.

When the dark negative force called kundalini or yin is taken to the Sahasra and when it is united with the light, the positive, the yang, the seeker attains the perfect stillness or samadhi. This union of energies when maintained in equilibrium can bring in man the qualities of equanimity and unconditional love.

This concept is not different from Christian beliefs. In Christianity the Christ is said to be the head and the world is the body, his bride.The new testament asserts that "we are many parts of one body". We are the bride awaiting the union with our bridegroom the Christ! All concepts are intertwined and in fact are one in spirit. How have different people, cultures and different religions spoken in different words about the same phenomenon? Obviously, where science cannot go, the opened heart goes, and it can be trusted to have come back with the right answers! That is how all people spread apart speak the same thing.

It can be seen that the relation of the human head and body is in similarity to the relation between God and creation.The microcosm is evidently in the image of the Macrocosm.

The undivided infinite Brahma on the other hand is pure consciousness. Creation happens when the undivided separates into a polarity of yin yang, positive negative, night day, light dark. And so creation is not possible without this division or conflict. That is why all life form feels this double pull, this conflict which separates us from our true undivided identity.

The yin in our body pulls down towards the earth and the yang energy in our body moves upwards. When these oppositly spiraling forces converge, unite in an individual, he is able to escape this polarity more and more through inward focus.

The yang and the yin energies spiral in the body in concentric circles and the converging of these opposite spirals at the central point can be represented as infinity. Infinity represents equilibrium or unity, the balance between male and female forces.The union is experienced and described as a feeling of bliss. Being a dynamic equilibrium, this union or infinity needs to be repeatedly balanced by awareness (Infinity though is the ultimate destination,is in flux and so is required to be kept in balance by awareness).

When this union happens we are more aware of the pure consciousness within the very centre of these converging spirals. When we focus into this pure consciousness, bring awareness to the very centre of the spiral, the point of infinity; the pairs of opposites vanishes completely which is felt as a stillness. When we seek answers in this state, the answers are reflected on our mind just as as the moon is reflected clearly in still waters. The stiller the mind, the more centered; the clearer the picture.


Though the yang is centred in the head and the yin in the body, yet if any chakras are not open the other chakras can compensate. For example though the right and left brains have different functions still when the right brain is damaged in some accident it has been noted that the left can take over many of its functions and vice versa. Similarly when lower chakras are blocked, the chakras in head can compensate for yin as well. That is each incomplete unit can be complete too!

In fact everything in the universe is such that each microcosm can be the image of the whole macrocosm. This means that the macrocosm called heaven is not merely the destination, it can be there in each microcosm called a human maintained in a fluctuating equilibrium, quite like how the whole of universe is!

Ideally, from the smallest unit to the biggest everything should become complete, and each microcosm has to be united to the macrocosm.

What happens when there is imbalance of energy? Shiva is yang, or can be called masculine energy and shakti is yin or feminine energy. Either energy on its own in the individual has its issues. The yin alone can make a man addicted to the lusts of the world, aids in developing manipulating capacities born out of self interests; whereas the yang alone can make a man too straightforward to survive in the world, also leads to intolerance to any kind of evils and a quite unforgiving nature. These imbalances in nature, happens when some chakras are blocked.

What causes the blocks in the yin or yang chakras? Yin is often blocked in overly religious people and yang is blocked in overly worldy people. Religion often leads to non acceptance of the world, ones sexuality etc and can lead to blocking of the lower chakras but as stated, the fall side is that it can make man unforgiving because of a denying of the worldly aspects like sex and self interest. On the other hand the lack of religious fear can make a man give in totally to the world and inturn blocks the upper chakras. It can make a man very adept at meeting selfish wishes by the use of manipulation, but with total lack of justice, and conscience.

Uniting of the forces leads to balance of divine strength with the powers of the world. With time and practice opening of the lower chakras in a person with an already opened yang, leads to tolerance, forgiveness, unconditional love and worldly tact as well. Whereas opening of the upper chakras in a person with higher yin, helps in reducing addictions, slavery to lusts, increases empathy, justice and fairness.

But this united energy is again a tool in our hands.The balance between Yin and Yang as stated before is dynamic, that is it is constantly changing. How do we balance it? We can consciously balance it by balancing our external focuses; by not getting too dragged into any one aspect of life.

That is if we find ourselves focused on instincts, we have to balance it with intellectual activites That is when a yin center is newly opened there might be an increased focus on worldly things which needs to be consciously balanced with the yang.

In fact we can understand which energy we have yet to open in us or use optimally, by analyzing either ourselves or our circumstances. Life's circumstances compliment our internal state. Our circumstances are the aids to any unopened or underused chakra. All things pass and so if we stand through the toughest circumstance without breaking, and focus on solutions, then it in turn can strengthen us.

In other words; when we are pulled down by difficulties, our inner resources can be pulled up. It can not only unlock the unopened centres of strength in us but also serve as opportunities to work with our newly opened energies and develop holistically. In a way we do create our circumstances and we can change our circumstance by changing from within towards balance. The more balanced we are the easier it is to maintain equanimity in all circumstances.


We know the Lord's prayer that Jesus gave us in which we implore to God saying “Your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven”! God always intended earth to be a paradise! God intended each individual to be perfect and whole like Him and when we surrender to his will, he pushes us towards the perfection he wants in us slowly and surely!

We lost our paradise through disobedience, by giving in to the lower pulls and closing the upper pull when in fact we were intended to be balanced. Naturally the lower pull can be stronger and more overpowering and therefore the codes of conduct, the fear of God and hence obedience is required to maintain a balance of energies. Giving in forever to lower energies is the real hell a man creates for himself, which he realizes eventually but feels too trapped and addicted to get out of.

God intended earth and man to be like heaven which is only possible through obedience to the laws written in our hearts. Despite being conflicted in every moment, awareness of what is within and without can help us live each moment in a balanced union of the forces. These powers help the spirit to transcend the current level/plane of existence and be born fully into the spiritual realm while still living the earthly existence. All religions have given us codes of conduct which can replicate heaven on earth, God in man; but internal change and realization of this unity is required for human kind to bring about this heaven within and on earth.

It is in our power to make life and earth a pleasant journey, a heaven every moment and not merely a hell road to a destination called heaven. If that was not God's will as well then there would not have arrived incarnations or avatars to teach us ways to bring about the heaven on earth, to bring about equilibrium whenever there is too much of disequilibrium in the world energies. There would not have been a Jesus telling us “Do not let your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid”John 14:27.

We are not here on earth to live a deteriorated conflicted existence rather we are intended to overcome the world and be transformed into heavens within our beings.
“Neither shall they say, Lo here! or, lo there! for, behold, the kingdom of God is within you.” (Luke 17:21)

Arriving at Freedom (Equilibrium 7)

I was frantically searching, asking, looking for something. I didn’t know what because I probably was afraid of what I knew I would find. When we reach a long desired destination then we still by default go on searching. It’s like the dog who turns round this side and that side frantically many times before finally sitting down. Reaching the most important goal of life, feels like that; not able to accept that we have arrived, that we will have to search no more, go nowhere, sit now, ..for ever!?

So I decided that what I was searching, was a meditation that could lead to centering on oneself, to thoughtlessness, as thinking too much is the door to madness!.( But in my eyes “I AM thinking”, so was I searching how not to be me? How to put an end to myself? That was already disturbing my equilibrium!)

'What you are searching for is already there’. I usually take a book to read as I wait for my son's school bus. That day I grabbed a book in random, hurridly glanced at it: Oh no! J Krishnamurthy” It was one of a set of books my husband had brought months ago which I had abandoned after the first two pages. Titled “Beyond Violence” Something I had thought was beyond me! Shucks; no time to select another book, I thought and took the book anyway. At the stop I decided to read as I usually prefer..in random. And there it was! My husband had, as alway, brought to me the right book!

There it was the chapter- ”Meditation! To Meditate is to be Aware. It told me that one cannot stop thinking, but that one needs to distinguish thinking from awareness. To think is to use past memories and data to process current data. Thinking can breed pleasure and fear. Awareness on the other hand is seeing and comprehending the truth without judging, without fear, without pleasure.


It is difficult to write when you have to include the name Krishnamurthy. I will try anyway. Well, going by Krishnamurthy’s (ahem) ‘thoughts’ (He would have sneered at that word 'thoughts'!; by his ‘analysis’?, no he hates that word too, heck 'thoughts' it is!) I realize that in ‘awareness’ (the only word he seems to like…uh huh ‘like’?) there would be no conflict, no movement, just a standing still.

Do we know “no movement”? We only know movement! We know what the feeling is of 'conflict', of the pull to reach some where, or the polarity of good bad, right wrong, past future;a movement from what is, to what should be. But really, what is it to have reached the ultimate destination with nowhere to go? Can we handle what it is to have arrived. To arrive means ‘not trying to escape anything and not trying to move towards anything’.


This is a painting I made six or seven years ago describing which I wrote a poem in 2009.

Conflict

Dreams fly and soar,they are wings fluttering free
Truth grounds and floors,it is earth rooting me
Am I free am I rooted, or ‘conflict’ in entirety!

Oh the sky has its pull, but the earth has its hold
Yet mind is never still, though the past put in mould
Yes, there are the wishes....then there is the practicality!

I move to a future, then move back to a past
I am pulled, I am held, I am tearing apart
Oh I stop the striving, ‘Pull apart to a rarity!’

The light shines on me, but darkness doesn’t leave
In my hands there is joy, but inside there is grief
Bright.. the ideals, untouched...reality.
We are fed into a particular view from our childhood but reality seems different. So we are confused, we are in conflict; like the plant rooted by the earth and also reaching towards the sky. As long as we depend on something, as basic as the earth to stand on, as basic as beliefs, we are conflict. As long as we are searching for the sky, for understanding, we are conflict; for we stand on some beliefs which don't free the mind as it strives towards freedom of thought. As long as we are thinking we are conflict as we are interpreting ‘what is to know’ according to our limited collected “what we know”. How can we learn just to observe with freedom, to be aware, to be free of conflict even as we walk through this mysterious journey of life?


'Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me' Psalm 23;4 seems very comforting. How beautiful I used to think to be shepherded by The Lord to the destination. But infact this verse 4 in the psalm 23, also means a path of darkness, and possibilities of straying and so descipling, using the rod and staff to keep the sheep, from wandering! It can mean a lot of pain when we don’t realize when to let go of a past and walk towards future.

I have seen that whenever I hold on to a place and do not want to leave it, everything I valued there quite visibly starts to deteriote and then I become more willing to leave it. Sometimes despite the signs we may still hold on until it becomes unbearably painful. Or when I run from something that I should confront, then I find I have only run into the same situations repeating, and I realize I have to stop running and confront. Rod and staff indeed!

I sometimes wish I shouldn’t want anything that the "Shepherd", the Lord doesn’t wish rather than be hit so painfully. But I also realise that to "let go" has a certain strengthening factor, it develops independence, to enjoy the grass and yet leave when the rod gently taps. With time trust also develops; that this tap is for my good. The tap then becomes comforting, a sigh that I am watched over. Learning thus not to become dependent on any pleasure, learning to enjoy the new path, trusting the shepherd to know the right way and letting go with that faith over any personal desires.

When we let go with faith, some day we realize what we were looking for we already have, for what we look for comes with us, travels with us just as we travel with the Lord and leave everything our dreams our wishes with trust in him. 'My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me.' John 10:27 What is really ours is always with us and is never separated by birth, death,or eons.

Could the moment of trust be a destination? But what is the feeling of having arrived at the destination and having nowhere to go, nothing to pursue.How do we recognize it and what happens after? Where to from nowhere! ? Would we be frantically looking this side and that side, turning round and round, not sure how to sit down! Could Krishnamurthy help us sit?


From Krishnamurthy what I basically take away is the intent to free each moment from the past experience and the future experience and arrive at the present experience. I know all intellectuals say that but he explained why we hold on to a past or move towards a future we would like. And why even love as we understand is in fact violence!. According to him it is fear that makes us hold to past pleasurable experiences because we are afraid of losing it, we want to recreate it in our future Love brings pleasure and the dependence for pleasure and then this pleasure brings the fear of losing it, it brings in the violence of jealousy. These are thus all interconnected. Love and violence are the same energy, the energy of division. A movement from what is to what is wanted, desired.

He gave a very powerful example, simply stated; If we saw a wild animal say a lion, we recognize it as danger and would we not as a result try to get away from it? In the same way if we really saw that love is in fact violence, a danger, we would not want it anymore!

Krishnamurthy takes repeated readings to understand intellectually. It takes many more days to understand experientially. It takes confronting. We have to confront our fears or pleasure (if u confront one you are confronting the other too!). Lets confront then - If my thoughts are producing fear, it means I am running away from something? What? Loneliness? Let me look at all around me, Is anybody going to stay with me for ever and ever. I will die, they will die. Then? I, my spirit is alone, all are alone. Nobody carries anything or anybody.

How long will any person be with you can you tell? Who can u say will be with you for ever and ever as long as ur spirit is? Not any earthly body surely.

I accept loneliness as the truth of me, of all mankind. Nobody is there for anybody eternally! That is what I knew and was running away from, afraid of accepting. There is nothing to what is generally called love and togetherness!
When I finally confronted, I felt liberated, joyful. I am lonely! (yeahee) I had feared I would be shattered by the truth that was knocking at my consciousness for acknowledgement for a long long time. "Confronting" I realized is the process that helps move from 'thought' to 'awareness'! The worst moment is just before we confront our fear. The truth on the other hand, is indeed liberating. The truth made my heart laugh in its realization! Everything there is, is just me. My whole universe is me, for ever and ever and ever! I am complete in myself?! Life is ephemeral, everything any man may seek, love, fame, success is all ephemeral; then why seek it? Seek something that is for ever and ever and ever. Seek the self, one's own eternal soul, one's own only companion.

Filling our life with love is evading the truth of our completeness, by ignorance we see completeness as loneliness and so we try to fill our lives with love as an attempt at running away from the truth and then this love brings in fear of losing it (it never was a part of 'everlasting' and our heart knew it), that brings in efforts to preserve it, brings in jealous anger.

The escape from this lion, towards freedom is only in confronting the truth that love and togetherness is a lie. That nobody can be there for anybody for ever. We are our own universe .

Loving is merely loving oneself, but centering on oneself is not selfishness.When we realize that nobody can be there for us, we have only one option, of being there for others. Devoid of the need for another, the need for pleasure, the need for words, comfort, support, such a complete person relates to others in fact in a much better way, ‘without expectations’. When our cup is full, it flows out, when we arrive, we become the channel. Jesus said “I am the way”.When we become fully aware to Jesus, as he shepherds us, we arrive. When we arrive, 'sitting down' means becoming the way, the passage, the channel for the Divine Love that is the Shepherd Jesus.
There is that lovely Hymn “Make me a channel?

The last stanza
“ Make me a Channel of your peace.
It is in forgiving that we are forgiven
In giving to all that we receive
And in dying that we are born to eternal life”

Whatever you do to others good or bad, you do to yourself. Don’t we see, If we cannot forgive ourselves small things, we cannot tolerate others either. When we can forgive others big things we can forgive ourselves too. When we support we get support by default, two people holding each other. When we see no purpose to anything in the world, we stop pursuing, we arrive. When we rise above our fears, give up that which we think is a requirement for our happiness, we get happiness, the freedom from fear. When we give up searching, we find, the truth alights on us. When we embrace the sorrow we are running from we are freed of it. Giving up the ephemeral world, we get freed of its conflict and gain the eternal self. When we are neither held to the ground nor trying to reach the sky, when we are as blank as the space, we are free. When we desire not this way, nor that, we are free of the pull on either side. When we stop resisting, stop reaching out, when we are still, we arrive.

We then live not in some expectation some hope. We embrace each moment as a new gift without the burden of the past or of the future. When we accept our loneliness we are complete. Its in turning in, centering in onself, embracing ourself, that we embrace all

Receiving and Giving ... Criticism!

I, a Virgo by sun sign, know that it is easier to give criticism than to listen to a criticism! To my defense I would say as is said for Virgos, that it is not because we deny our faults (if we do see it! ) but because we already have our own finger so painfully poking at our worst faults that we can’t bear another finger on it.

So let me start with what is more difficult; Receiving Criticism. Accepting that there is a need to change is what is required and is half the battle won. My biggest challenge has been my occasional but volcanic temper (allow me to blame it on paternal inheritance) I saw and accepted it as my biggest fault. I am usually soft and loving but occasionally I am capable of erupting like a volcano, and then the lava becomes beyond my control and it has to exhaust itself. After that blind hour,it’s the huge mess left to clear, the burnt hurt feelings that are piercingly visible after the destruction, that leave me with a lot to reconstruct and a lot to be regretful for long, which brought in again and again a desire to change.

But as long as people still understood, loved and accepted me, I only 'struggled' to control my burst outs quite ‘unsuccessfully’. Some friends would joke on it (when they saw me read book on Anger Management), or call it “Full Power time” (when blinded to “Who” I blew out at). It was only when I was rejected for my temper that I put 'my all' to ‘managing temper' and realized that I could indeed overcome my insurmountable weakness. Managing did not mean I stopped being a critic or that I never lost my temper but it meant I took care to notice the building steam and accepted it to myself and so removed it before it became volcanic and more destructive than intended. That is, I learnt to notice and pour out my emotions at a level where I could manage it calmly, rather than ignoring it till it burst out; shocking me and others.

But in that process I learnt that sometimes rejection can be the greatest incentive to change and that we can even keep ‘rejection’ as a tool in our kitty to use in rare instances (for a short while only of course) where acceptance may have been the spoiler!

Rejection added to criticism is difficult to bear but there are a few things that experience taught me that minimized the sting I feel while at the receiving end of ‘due or undue’ criticism.

1. We can bear to listen to all types of criticism, if …..we don’t have a perfectionistic expectation from ourselves. That is if we can first accept ourselves as we are, and then accept others as they are (not expecting them to know how to criticize constructively)! Once we accept, we don’t feel (and cannot be made to feel) worthless for our faults.

2. We need to accept that perfection is impossible; quite plainly because what is perfect for one maybe imperfect for another! This does not mean we cannot or need not strive to reach our idea of perfection; but rather it means to realize that as individuals we have our limitations of the areas we can achieve perfection in. That is to say, we cannot meet every ones subjective ideas of perfection! (Well, even thinking that is exhausting!) What is important then is sincerity in all we undertake. We can only strive to do our best in whatever is a requirement.

3. We have to realize that perfection can never be a requisite for acceptance. In fact it is the little imperfections that set one apart from another and only a person who is incapable of truly loving, would demand perfection. We often fall in love with a particular character that either compliments who we are or is very like us, or is very like someone in our family and so has a comfort factor. Love is easier to understand if we remember that we develop a love for animals as well! I love dogs, I love cats! What does that mean? It means there is a particular character that we may be drawn to. Strength? You probably love Elephants. Loyalty? You love Dogs. Beauty? The cat family maybe. Energy? Squirell the cute busy body!. On the other hand if it is Smartness? You love intelligent Humans. Goodness? You love empathy in Humans. Perfection? Sadly you can only love God. Because like God, we can only imagine perfection!

But it is true that ‘good’ people are more often looked out for ,as partners. A friend recently told me about how people helped each other selflessly when the earthquake (plus tsunami and nuclear) disaster happened in Japan in March 2011 and wondered if the “civility” was as a result of their high average IQ as compared to other countries or it was their strict adherence to civil attitudes that resulted in comparatively higher IQ in them. (i.e whether “being good” was the cause or the effect of High IQ)

I realized then, why “goodness” is so attractive! Wasn’t civilisation itself the result of superior brain power in man as compared to animals! We instinctively look for the more civil the more “good”.
But it is quite observable that highly intelligent (smart) people can also be highly aggressive and selfish, not very capable of handling emotions and caring for others. So surely High Emotional Quotient (EQ) rather than High Intelligence Quotient (IQ)could be the cause of being a “good” samaritan.
And I also believe EQ can be both the cause and effect of Goodness. That “becoming civil or good” can also result in increasing the EQ. Of course all this is speculation with no tangible proof, but what I am leading to is that ‘a critic is a friend, who can help us develop our emotional quotient.’

What's the benefit of 'the Goodness'!? “Being good” takes us to a higher plane of existence. Personally it can expand our aura to the seventh level. Socially it can take us to a perfectly civil and good world. But from there where?

The whole universe is said to work on the principle of Giving and Receiving,and I really believe that it is indeed the one basic principle! I imagine the play of the universe like a game with many levels(compare with a computer game). Life on Earth is one of the levels with seven levels (or heavens) above (just as we exist in several planes as well). There are many lessons to be learnt on this earth that help to perfect our game plan and escape to the next level. What's the use of winning this game? Each level leads us closer to perfect Bliss! We can expand to the seventh level from the first level. That's about all we can know, but once in the game we just have to play it to the end. There is simply no meaning of getting bored or tired with the game; no meaning to quitting!

Everything we do, all we journey with or meet along our journey are just mutual helpers in the learning. No man can grow much as an island. We all need each other. Whatever lessons our subconscious has been wanting to learn, another may be more equipped to provide us with and so they are the ones we meet in the journey. We may push them away but they stay or keep coming back into our lives till they deliver their lesson; on the other hand after having learnt a lesson, no matter how we try to hold on to someone, they are out of our lives, or become passive in our lives!


I heard somewhere that “those who come into our lives are like postmen who have come to deliver our mail’. We have to respect them as that even if it is a criticism they delivered. True, whatever the content delivered, how can a postman be blamed! We might at worst kill the postman, but in another time or in another lifetime another postman will come to deliver the same message until we learn it. It is always better to take it the first time around.
How? I once asked a friend how he is able to listen so attentively to a particular “boring teacher”. He said, “We only learn as much as we respect another” That was one valuable lesson! Indeed, the lesser our ego and feelings of superiority, the more the lessons we can learn from the other to guide our conduct in life that in turn earns us the higher plane of existence.

Now there can be times when we may have to serve as the postman and deliver a post no matter what; to do the role of delivering criticism! And that brings me to the sermon this Sunday. The topic was that we all have a purpose although we may not fully understand what it is. Some main points were- All of us are in a way prophets and priests; the names we have are god given names which point to our purpose and so we should search the meaning of our names. He further said that the prophet’s duty is of speaking the truth, whether he is listened to or not and no matter that speaking the truth always has severe consequences. John the Baptist (meaning of John is God is Gracious) was beheaded when he spoke the truth. That's often the price of speaking the truth. The priest continued saying that Prophets are also very human, they had their failings and weaknesses that they had to struggle with. St. Paul asked God three times to remove a particular weakness but it did not happen. When he realized he had to live with that weakness he said, "For when I am weak, then I am strong” (2 Corinthians 12:10).The Priest explained it to mean that in our weakness, we rely entirely on the strength of God.

We all have our failings that we struggle with and which come in the way of our purposes. Sometimes our purpose is delivering a post against our weakness, say a weakness for love (I am definitely not going to be loved for this “dirty Job”of criticising!), despite lack of trust in its usefulness (it’s only going to spoil it for me and do them no good either!), despite fear of the consequences (wonder where I will end this time!). Indeed, when we do a deed because it has to be done in spite of all our weaknesses pulling us down, that is when we would have shown strength!

I have known that bitter truth, no matter how lovingly, tactfully and calmly presented will not fully lose its bitterness and bite and hence possibilities of a kick back! But then I also know that a critic, a teacher can only extend his hand full of the wealth of wisdom; whether the lesson is taken from the hand or whether the hand is spit upon depends entirely on the student; depending on whether the student can recognize it as wealth or only see it as filth.

I am reminded of something Jesus had said: 'No servant is greater than his master.' If they persecuted me, they will persecute you also. If they obeyed my teaching, they will obey yours also.’ John 15;20. It is really ignorance to be bothered about the result when we have to be the postman, because our first allegiance is towards our creator who assigns us a job and only after that to our own analytical mind that can never fully comprehend God’s ways. It is also ignorance to be bothered when we are ‘shown our place’ because how we are treated tells “not where we stand but rather where the receiver stands in terms of spiritual development”. No matter if we are not listened to, are insulted, rejected, hurt or even killed, we have to remember that there are no purposes in life greater than delivering what has been assigned (when it is our turn to deliver) and receiving as meekly as is possible for us (when it is our turn to receive).

Cap it Now not Later!

An easy going attitude can be a virtue as well as a fault! Rather than being uniformly easy going in attiutude, I believe it is more favorable to know - where to go easy and where to be firm and being able to follow through with that knowledge! But what we often see is, mountains made out of molehills and molehills made out of mountains! Much of the evils in life are the result of being firm where we should have gone easy, and going easy where we should have been firm.

As another child falls into an uncapped abandoned borewell and dies(June 20), one cannot but pause and feel guilty along with the nation for having gone easy on the first offender years ago who did not follow the regulation of capping an abandoned borewell. If only the media had made it a point to do a follow up after the first such incident covered six years ago(Prince) and shown the nation not only the drama of painful circumstances but also the grimness of what happens to the offender, then the many following deaths could have been avoided. If only a punishment grim enough had really been meted out then, to create enough fear, it could have prevented such callous attitudes in serious matters as this.

As I flipped through the biography of a gangster "Dawood" who went on to be the cause behind terror in India, I came upon a passage that told me his beginnings in a small conning gang. "As they got away with little offenses they grew more and more confident that they could get away with anything in the country"! And I knew then, that its again our fault; if the soicety had made it a point to severely punish the first offence, it would have nipped crime at the bud and society would not become responsible for terror and thousands of deaths in the nation.

Sometimes forgiveness and mercy is a worse sin. As the little girl Mahi called out to her father to save her out of the borewell, his father could do nothing but wait outside helplessly for three days. The whole world joined together to pray to God the Father for the life of the girl, and still He did not intervene either. If we don't learn when a life is spared as with Prince, what do we require to learn?...A Mahi? (a name which means "Earth Goddess"...)

I have seen that when an issue repeats in our life, it means only one thing; we haven't learnt our lesson with the first. What is the lesson we are not learning in this and other issues in our country? Why are we too kind to callousness and to the likes of Kasab who go on a killing spree? In being kind to one life we are being unkind to thousands of innocent lives in future who may be suspected to be another Kasab,another Dawood, another uncapped borewell.

Are we too much of the forgiving kind? No, not really! We are merely hypocrites. If we (the common man) see one frivolous error in a man who likes to walk the straight path, we are quick to point it out. Why? It is because he is "affected" by his faults and because we enjoy his discomfort in being affected.

But we see "ourselves" in the likes of people who leave a bore well open for saving expenses; we see "ourselves" in a Dawood who in a lust of money, manhood and power showed so called "bravado", "cleverness" and "manliness" in his growth to a Don; which a "man cant help appreciating", in spite of everything it meant eventually. There is no fun in criticising and punishing "ourselves" for having saved some effort and money in capping a borewell, but yeah 'such fun' in pricking the perfectionist as a duffer and good for nothing, over say an umbrella he failed to take! We see ourselves in people who lust the world and not in people who love the good and so we pick the wrong, frivolous battles to fight!

We do have to be wise and not frivolous in choosing our battles. . But I reiterate what I wrote before....If we laze out of the first worthwhile battle, we create for us a worse and woeful war to fight someday.

Fighting for our Spaces

Apart from the convenience of being totally understood, there are also a lot of household tips to gain from having a married woman as a friend in the neighbourhood. But since last four years I have not had such luck, (although I have had unmarried friends, which does not give the same benefits). It was frustrating until one day I decided; what the heck I will just ask my neighbor directly whatever I might need to know, and I asked -“Whats the best way to keep the house clear of coakroches.” And pleasantly without the process of intimate friendship and sharing I realized I could just get away with good solutions from pointed questions without much embarrassment!

I called up another friend and got the same suggestion and the whole procedure for the massacre as well. It must be good I decided. So I brought the powder and made the dough and stuck it wherever I felt the roaches would visit. The next morning as assured, I expected to see some dead roaches lying about. I was bitterly disappointed..Not even one! But then from the second day on I saw the dead roaches here and there. And I was so thrilled to see the dead ones! The writhing ones I smashed to the finish line.

It is a slow process to becoming a murderer. First time it is difficult and then it becomes easier and easier, until your senses are numbed to the misery of the coachroach. I, the tender heart, was so merciless with the roaches. “Be careful about what you condemn, for that you are in danger of becoming!” is what came to my mind as I boasted about the number of kills each day. But then Gandhiji's words came to my rescue or rather my modified version of what he said.

Well let me warn you first; what he said may not even remotely seem to be linked to my topic. So here's what he said “Earth provides enough to satisfy every man's need, but not every man's greed." But as a corollary doesn’t it mean “In whatever evil we do we have to check whether it is for a justifiable need or a reckless greed.”? Am I twisting it too much? Well I know Benjamin Franklin seems to have said, "Man is a very reasoning creature; he creates a reason for whatever he wants to do". Yeah sure I know that; but examples might help here to justify my reasoning. Killing a common fowl for food as opposed to killing for sport, is an example of it. If I had gone about hating and killing all the coakroaches in the world it would have been an evil, than killing some roaches that encroached into a space I mark as mine. That is a need. It should have respected my space and kept away or bear with the consequences, right?

“Every war is fought for peace” Once the threat to our space is removed, and the adversary learns to respect our space, the war should cease. "Life is too short to spend in quarrels", and yet life is lived by doing what needs to be done for peace, even when it is a quarrel, a battle, a war that is a requisite to attain it.. We often have to fight a few battles to avoid a destructive war

And now for some whisper of an advice; whatever we do, even if termed wrong, may be perfectly fine as long as it brings good in the long run, but there are dangers when conscience erodes or when we lose sight of the purpose. That is why even one offence is such a dangerous thing, which is also why some religions prefer to teach to refrain from even killing a fly; as one may slowly learn the pleasures of killing (or other evils similarly). We might chose a “wrong path” where the end justifies the means; but we must always check not to become what we once despised. Our war should easily cease when it is peace.

Waking Up .......

The Awake ; It represents the opening out to the field of cosmic intelligence. The point through which this opening or attuning happens is the Sahastra Chakra. Its name means "thousand petal lotus”. This attuning can happen after a period of focused meditation of love towards the devine

The Sahastra or Crown Chakra is located at the crown or top of the head (baby's soft spot). It is the opening to the universe- to the highest consciousness or the spiritual self. It is connected with upper brain (cerebral cortex) and is also associated with the pineal gland (third eye)

This is where the interlocking happens between the mortal and the divine. The mind is no longer contained within the head, it expands. Just as the interconnections between the left and right brain leads to communication between the logical and the emotive faculties (left and right); the chakra at which the connection is made is such a similar interlocking of the mind to the higher intelligence.

The energy travels through this connection in a clockwise or anticlockwise spiralling motion and is converted by the glands for the physical development (as of brain functions) and personal growth (spiritual qualities like unconditional love). It's like opening a window in the mind, letting in the refreshing outside air. In fact better breathing is similar in effect in bringing about wholesome development and is a part of the yogic approach to spiritual growth.

The opening of this chakra, the inflow of divine energy is like the scattering of seeds on fertile land (just as Jesus explained in a parable about the Kingdom of God being like a farmer scattering seeds). The seed is not seen and the implications of the event may not be understood by the seeker, until with added years,the seeds sprout, the plants are noticed, the flowers bloom and the smell emanates to all. It's only then that the seeker realizes, to have in fact woken up to the Kingdom





"...They sprouted, grew, and produced a crop that was thirty, sixty, and even a hundred times as much as had been planted!" (Mark Ch 4)