Equilibrium

Part 1- Intro

I had been reading two books simultaneously, possibly because I wasn’t content with the concept of either. Both concepts are true in their own way but seem incomplete. One was about ‘letting go’ of our false self(emotions generated by body). It suggested the escape from troubling emotions by saying ‘I (higher self/soul/cosmic consciousness/true self) am not feeling this, my false self is feeling this. Also saying, ‘I(true self) don’t understand these feelings!

I really can't accept that because I believe that recognizing the inner self (higher self) should not require us to deny existence to our body! After all, the Higher self 'chose' to be in a body, then how can it totally ignore the existence of the body and its emotions!

The other book is about ‘the law of attraction’ It says that 'if we are feeling negative, we draw negative experiences. Therefore to bring all our desire’s to fulfillment, we should make sure we are always feeling good. Whenever we feel bad, we should shift to thinking something good so that we can feel good and draw good.' But then what about resolving issues that are making us feel negative! Moreover isn't it Life and often negative circumstances that lead the body, the false self, to search for better (lasting) or rather Higher solutions and so leads it to recognize the Higher self within. Why should then one prefer a particular circumstance over other? Rather one should let the body lead itself in whatever way to complete and lasting self discovery.

It was while I was shuffling with dissatisfaction between these two books, hoping to somehow finish them, that I happened to see the movie Equilibrium. It has made it to my favourite movies list (inspite of violence and a little lack in logic) because it reflected my point of view and satisfied me. The story is about a step taken to prevent another world war. It is decided that the root cause of war is man’s ability to feel. So to remove anger, jealousy and hate, a medicine is taken by the human race which make them emotionless. The price of this is that they don’t feel the good emotions either, but atleast there is no war and the human race is preserved. But the question is what are they living for? Just to carry forward the race? Finally the conclusion of the story is, 'Emotions are not the cause of war. Emotions are a gift that makes life worth living and not a mere existence. The cause of war is the lack of skills to manage emotions. It is when not managed, that the gift becomes chaos'.

The question now is only how to manage the emotions? Only when we recognize that we are actually a part of the infinite and that the body and its emotions are instruments to us that we would try to objectively learn about this instrument without ego association with the instrument. We would then recognize correctly its strong points and weak points and use it as an instrument. But still… 'I' am here within it to use it, not to let it gather dust just because this emotion charged instrument is not me! Fine, it is not me, but it is mine, and it is in my hand to be used….correctly.

When the instrument experiences the negative emotions, we would try to solve its problems in ways that suit it’s make. Sometimes it may require recognizing the futility or stupidity of an emotional reaction and so ‘letting go’ of it. But at other times, it involves understanding a reaction and the need for a proper immediate action and so requires just ‘letting be’, under ‘Higher supervision’.
I told this to someone but my idea was dismissed as lower understanding and I was provided with a book ‘ Practicing the power of now’ by Eckhart Tolle (especially to thwart my belief in possibility of destiny). I began reading it and quite amazingly I find it infact seconding what I believe!

I quote-‘To relinquish judgement does not mean that you do not recognize dysfunction…when you see it. …….You will then either be totally free of reaction or you may react and still be the knowing, the space in which the reaction is watched and allowed to be.’
Also I quote, 'There are cycles of success...and there are cycles of failure....The down cycle is absolutely essential for spiritual realization.' Also, 'when you have reached a certain degree of presence, you don't need negativity anymore to tell you what is needed in your life situations. But as long as negativity is there, use it. Use it as a kind of signal that reminds you to be more present.'
These words in this particular book reflected my thoughts in quite the exact words!

And so I am assured and can affirm that I believe that Being the True self is not always about ignoring negativity around and within. For Example spirituality is not about letting other people abuse you with their words or actions, just because the higher self is not supposed to be affected! Rather, being the true self is often acknowledging the feeling of the body and using the accumulated wisdom and understanding of the brain and also the intuition of the heart to carry through the body's reaction. Being the true self is not about going to the other extreme. It is all about recognizing the other extreme but arriving at the right equilibrium of an awakened spirit living a whole and fulfilled life within a body.